Well. It's that time. Tomorrow, we will be heading up to Provo and I will enter the MTC. I have already been set apart as a missionary (shh...I probably shouldn't be on the computer). I've been thinking though, and not a lot of people know the process of how I went from being completely opposed to a mission to getting my call. I know I surprised a lot of people with the big announcement. So I thought I would share that story with whoever cares enough to be reading this blog...a.k.a. my grandmas.
At the time that Annie got her mission call to Guatemala, I believed that I would be following in her steps as soon as I could. It was fun to think about the time that I would be able to fill out my own papers and get my own mission call. However, a few days after Annie left, during General Conference, President Monson made the famous age change announcement. When I heard that announcement, I'm a little embarrassed to say that I completely freaked out. I was not excited at all. All of a sudden, it was real. I could have started my papers right then (and now I wish I would have). I guess I just wasn't ready yet. People started asking me if I was going to go on a mission and I just told them I didn't feel like it was the right time for me. The truth is, I never prayed about it because I was scared of the answer. The more people asked, the more opposed to the idea I was. Later, I decided that my justification for not going was that I didn't want to be someone who just jumped on the bandwagon and went because everyone else was.
Fast forward to this summer living with my family. I had put a mission completely out of my mind and that was fine with me. But one Sunday, in Relief Society, we had a lesson about putting the will of Heavenly Father before our own. It hit me really hard because I realized that was the complete opposite of what I was doing. To top it all off, my mom told the story about how she decided to go on a mission even though it scared her. So, during the lesson, I opened up my heart just a little bit and said a prayer in my mind really quickly. I simply said, "Heavenly Father, if you want me to go, I'll go." The Spirit washed over me so strongly and I started crying so hard I had to leave halfway through the lesson. I knew there wasn't any way I could deny that I got a positive answer to that prayer.
About an hour after we got home from church, I walked into my parents' room and told my mom about my decision. She was really surprised, but has always been incredibly supportive of me. If it weren't for her, I probably wouldn't have actually gotten this far in the process. She is the one that set up the doctor and dentist appointments, made sure my paperwork was done correctly and sent in on time after I got my call. She has helped me along every step of the way even without knowing it.
Partly thanks to my mom and a lot thanks to divine intervention, putting in my papers went REALLY fast. The Sunday after I got my answer to serve, I talked to the Bishop and got the paperwork started. That Monday was my doctor's appointment. Tuesday was the dentist. By Friday the papers were done and submitted to the Bishop. A week later, I interviewed with the Stake President and they were submitted. This has only strengthened my testimony more. The Lord knows what He's doing. The process went so fast that I couldn't change my mind. He also sent me to a mother who knows how important missions are and would help make sure I got here after I got my answer.
Now, I'm not going to lie. When I opened my call, I still wasn't 100% convinced I was going to go. I was still hoping this was going to be a big test of my faith, and that Heavenly Father was going to pull the same thing He did to Abraham. I'm glad it wasn't. The more I have prepared for this mission, the more I know that I need to go. I'm so excited for this experience to serve in Tijuana--and no, I'm not scared of drug dealers or kidnappers or anything else there.
My faith has been tested a lot. Making this decision to go has been one of the hardest things I've done so far. I know that my mission is going to be even harder. But I'm ready. I'm ready to rely on my faith in the Lord to get me through. I love this gospel with all my heart and I am excited to share it with others. I know that Heavenly Father has a plan for me. Even though He answers prayers in ways we don't expect, He answers them. His plans for us are a million times better than our plans for ourselves. He's provided us with a way to return to Him after this life. Our older brother, Jesus Christ, came to Earth and created a way for us to repent and be made clean. His Atonement is real. It works for all of us. All we have to do is have faith. We've also been blessed with the Book of Mormon. It's true. All of it. I know because I've read it and I've prayed about it. I'm so grateful for the ways that amazing book has blessed my life. If you haven't read it, please do. If you have, read it again. Study it. Find things you haven't seen before.
I am so grateful for my wonderful family and friends. You have all helped me become a better person and get to where I am today. I am so overwhelmed by the support I have from all the people around me. You guys are truly amazing. Thank you so much! I can't wait to see you all again in 18 months. Be safe. Choose the right. :) Keep me updated about your lives through letters, emails, pictures, or whatever. I love you all. Thanks again.
Hermana Alexa Kay Nielsen
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